My department organized a farewell lunch for me last afternoon. I wanted to help my colleagues out but they shooed me out of it as they claimed that I was the ‘VIP’. To me, there is no such thing as whether I was the ‘VIP’ or not. I could always help out especially when all of them were busy with their work. I wanted to treat them the drinks but they refused to as they told me they wanted to do everything for me and treated me. I appreciate what they have done for me. I saw them running around in the midst of their work just to set up the room. As usual, the monster only stood by and watched. I really wonder of that is what we define by leader; the person who leads with her mouth and never dirties her hands. Anyway, I do appreciate the efforts and time put together for our makan (eating) session. I saw it as an opportunity to have meal together for the last time.
Christmas is coming. It is a season of giving. We do not just give only when Christmas is drawing near. If that is the case, that means we are self se3rving and self centered for most part of the year. That will only lead to more cruelty in the cold and merciless society where everyone only wants and fights for what he wants. Personally, Christmas helps me to focus more of giving, bringing hope to others, just like how the birth of Christ brings hope to the world. My action of giving my time and efforts in the projects I am involved with give birth to hope to the needy ones. In return, my soul is nourished with Love and warmth by simply giving. I am doing something different outside church for this year. For this year, I will be helping the World Vision at the booth at NEX in promoting and educating the public on child sponsorship and bridging the public and the organization in contributing gifts or cash to these underprivileged children and communities. World Vision is a foreign charity organization which get itself involved in various projects that help the selected the poorest areas in some countries like Mongolia in China, Ethopia, India, Philippines, etc. in helping not just the children to have basic needs and education but also in building the communities until they have the ability of self sustainability.
I am a human with logical thinking. At the back of my mind, especially after the fraud cases of National Kidney Foundation, SLA, etc., I am also sceptical about where our money will really go to, whether my efforts and time will go to drain if it were to be another fraud case. Worse still, my involvement only helps the conmen in their corruptive deeds if it were to be a fraud case. During the briefing last night, two child sponsors were invited to share their child sponsorship experiences. I still doubt the testimonies. However, I still get myself involved with this project because I rather give them the benefits of doubt than depriving these needy people of any help just because of my doubt. The World Vision is a Christian organization. I believe these volunteers and workers will not dare to use God’s name in vain. Even if they do, God will intervene one day and it will never be long before the truth is exposed. For every project that I am involved with, my prayers will always come first so that I will keep myself focus on God and being the instrument to share such tender Love with the people involved. I always believe no man can ever beat God since all men are God’s creation. That explains why I still get involved with this project though I still doubt with my rational mind as any normal people out there. I rather rely on faith than my limited capacity of my rational thinking. God will protect me and all His children from being instruments of any forms of abuse. I have lifted the whole project up to God. I will just do my best and leave the rest to God.
I am writing in a personal capacity. If you would like to sponsor any child or contribute any gifts through paying for the selected gifts by the World Vision after identifying which items these people in different Area Development Programmes (ADP) need the most to survive, please visit any booths at
NEX (1-18 Dec 2011)
Jurong Point (1-22 Dec 2011)
Marina Square (8-22 Dec 2011)
I will be at booth at NEX for some of the shifts. When it comes to giving, there should not be calculation. If it is calculated, it is stipulated with conditions. It is no longer unconditional love. It becomes a transaction, such as contributing some money just to boost one’s ego or for show to the others. Of course, I am not asking anyone to give beyond your ability. Just be generous with what you have. Whatever you give, you will receive manifolds from God in many ways. Never belittle that $1 that you give. To these needy people in the developing countries, it may mean many meals for a family. If everyone in Singapore were to contribute even just $0.10 and we pool the funds together, how many poor communities we could help?
I am thinking of sponsoring a child. But, it is a long term commitment of at least 2 years. Since I cannot hold on to a job at least two years, I would not want to break the child’s hope if my monthly contribution breaks at some point. When reaching out or helping others in any ways, there is a certain level of responsibility to carry. It is not like if I like it, I contribute. If I don’t like, I do not care. Imagine if I contribute for 9 months to the child and I am suddenly jobless and have to stop contributing to the child. What will happen to him? It only pulls him down from the 9 months of heaven to hell. It is very cruel to bring him hope and break it suddenly. My point is when reaching out to others or helping anyone, especially in long term, it requires a certain level of commitment. This commitment comes from the Love within. Sometimes, we may feel dry and ‘unloved’. That is why our faith must be strong in God through our regular communication with God since God is Love and His Love is never ending or limited. It is not like if God loves me, He cannot another person as intensely and cannot give His ‘attention’ to him/her. His ‘attention’ does not confine within space or time. In fact, This Love must be shared to multiply. Our commitment also shows our fidelity to God. If we are strong in our faith in God with fidelity, our commitment to these needy people will continue to spring from our received Love from God by our action of first connecting with God on a regular basis.
Well, I admit I have left the church for months. I am not holy if anyone deems I am so. I am not. I am not trying to be humble. I am just true to myself and others. I have not been ‘diligent’ with my quiet time with God as I spend moist of my time catching up with my sleep since I suffer from insomnia for a long time. I only pray regularly and confess my daily sins to God, asking God to help me to improve and praying for others who come to my mind during my prayers. Well, I am a person full of flaws who still cannot hold on to a job for long. But, I am trying my best. Wherever I am called to serve, I will try my best to serve. I am still a wanderlust led by God. I guess that is the best for me. I rather serve wherever I am called to than getting involved with ministries where I see fights for favour or positions. I rather be anonymous and disappear in the crowd. I do not yearn to be known as I am contented to have a few loved ones and friends with me. At least, I am happy now. I am not sure if I do not go to church and I will end up in hell. That is up to God to decide. Only He looks into my heart. I still love God. If not for God, I would have died long time ago.
During this season of giving, how are you going to contribute to the others, especially the needy and less fortunate ones? Just as Jesus has exclaimed, ‘What you do to the least of your brethren, you do unto Me…’ Who are the ‘ least brethrens’ around you or in your community? Any plans to give birth to hope to them? Take some time and look for them with your heart and the ‘eyes’ of God.
With Love,
Elena
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