Things have managed to die down for awhile before I start charging for a major event and a few projects. While I am waiting for the papers and emails to be cleared by my DD who will be away for a few days, this gives me an opportunity to slow down abit for some reflection.
I was chatting to a friend last night till one plus in the morning. It set me wonder why I am working so hard. (Ok, my mind multi tasks alot. While talking to her, my mind is also racing through al lot of things.) For what? What do I earn in the end? Am I really happy? Though I may have earned more money and got to higher position in the corporate world, am I really happy inside? The answer is, ironically, the emptiness within me is getting louder and louder. Have been reading through people's blogs and spiritual articles as part of my quiet time with God to get to know this Heavenly Father more. As today is the Ash Wednesday which marks the beginning of Lent period for us, my colleague came in with the ash marked as a cross on her forehead without her realizing that the cross was quite prominent to be even seen from far. I guess this serves as a reminder to me that I am just dust without the breath of life. This breath of life comes from Love. And, I am loved which explains my existence.
How often from time to time, in the midst of activities and pursuing what I want, have I forgotten the beauty of simplicity? I think the emptiness which becomes louder and louder as I am achieving more and more wants is God's calling out to me that I am getting more and more spiritually drier within and going towards direction further and further away from Him as I am filling myself with the material wants which can only be filled by the living water. Anyway, anything and anybody in this world can easily perish with time. Why am I so silly to focus and settle myself on things that will perish instead of hanging on to Love who is eternal? Of course, I am not saying that I should stop working and just studying God's Word. What I am referring to is my focus is not really right by the fact that the emptiness within me is getting louder.
Only when I allow to slow down and appreciate this breath of life from God as a gift to me every time I breathe, I will remember why I exist. I exist because of Love out of Love. I must spend some quiet time to allow this breath to be enjoyed. Have you ever seen people rushing through a fine dining? No, right? That is the idea. What's more? This breath of life is free of charge. I do not need to earn it. It is a gift from God to me. Isn't it romantic that I am receiving this gift of breath every second of my life? Recently, it is recommended by various sources that meditation does benefit a person's well being. Why is that so? Because it helps a person to be centered, to take a break away from the hassles of life for the whole body to rest. For Christians to meditate or to simply spend quiet time with God, it allows us to be in sync with God as part of Him since we are His children. It allows God to fill that emptiness deep within and to be God centered. it allows me to be soaked in the sea of Love in His Presence. Only then, I will be able to let this Love flow out of me to others.
This period of Lent is going to be very busy for me as it is peak period at my workplace with a major event coming and a major project going on. Well, God has reminded me not to forget to chill out with Him and soak in the sea of His Love so that I can walk further with this break. I am reminded I am loved no matter what.
With Love,
Elena
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